Sunday, September 17, 2006
I'm So Jaded
Frankly, I'm ready to go live here. Not because I'm expecting all heck to break in this country anytime soon, but because being in situations with other people makes me wretched. My husband tells me that, like my Evil Genius moniker states: "Few of your peers know you very well--even those you have known a long time--because you have expert control of the face you put forth to the world." Thing is, I've gotten so good at this expert control that even when I think my feelings are obvious to outsiders, I discover to my surprise that they weren't. I think I'm being totally out there, and instead I'm hiding behind a wall I've built up that I can't even see anymore. I'm a misunderstood social misfit, and I don't want to deal with the hurt anymore. No expectations, no disappointment.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
oops, soz, posted above comment as my gorgeous daughter.....
*blondely*
let's try that again...
sheesh baby
it looks like a hobbit hole to me.
if you meet aragorn, puh-leeze detain him with a second breakfast and i'll be right over.
but seriously, huge loves to you. funny, being such a blonde, what-ya-see-is-what-ya-get with me: there is not much lurking under the surface!!!
well, maybe just a little....
*huge grin* xx
"it looks like a hobbit hole to me.
if you meet aragorn, puh-leeze detain him with a second breakfast and i'll be right over."
I was thinking that too... well not the aragorn part =P But it looks like a cool place to live... it jsut needs to be HUGE like a hobbit hole =P (*coughandinNewZealandlikeahobbitholecough*)
Anyways,
I think everyone has their walls and like normal walls, I think they can be built down a little. I've never had experience with a situation like yours but I think if you worked at it you could unbuild your wall a little or take it down if thats what you wanted...
Hope I helped at least a smidge....
Hi Barb,
I can empathize with you...I've often been in the same situation and felt the same way. Having boundaries is good and healthy; so don't feel guilty about that.
In the past, people in my family have accused me of not caring about them because they didn't understand the way I am. I show that I care in different ways than a lot of people. However, I think they understand me better, now. I hope the same can happen for you -- that the people in your life can learn to understand you a little better so they can change their expectations.
Ya know, I thought it looked like Bag End the minute I saw it too. And I'll fight ya for Aragorn. :)
Susan, it's not that people have expectations of me, it's that I have expectations of them! Well, in this case. I was hurting and feeling ignored, and according to my husband I was giving off a "Leave me alone" vibe instead of an "I'm hurting" vibe. Then I wonder why anyone should bother to talk to me anyway. Ack.
Sorry you're feeling blue. What a great guy, that husband of yours!
My Latin student should be well by Wednesday, I look forward to seeing you then.
Post a Comment