At least, I know I am not really thrilled about Easter coming, and I imagine that is partly the cause of my current low mood. I feel rather Charlie Brown-ish. Holidays should be special; that's why they're holidays, right? Because they're special? But they're really not anymore, for me.
Maybe I'm getting old. When I was a child, a big part of the holiday excitement was the preparation, the things you did only once a year, the special meals, the family gatherings. But a lot of the wonder of a decorated tree or colored egg is gone, to my everlasting sadness. I certainly never wanted to lose that thrill, that special magic. And holidays anymore are just getting to be my husband, my daughters and myself.
Am I thankful and grateful that Christ took the punishment for my sins and died on the cross, then rose again, showing His complete victory over sin, death and the power of the devil? Absolutely, as much as a frail, sinful human can be. At the same time, feelings are transient; that's part of their nature. So I hope no one mistakes my lack of enthusiasm for a day on the calendar for a lack of appreciation of the events we choose to celebrate on that certain day. It's just that I don't like losing the holiday feeling. It makes me wonder what we celebrate holidays for, and makes it harder for me to create the special holidays for my own children that I think they should have. I think we in our human-ness need holidays, need fasts and feasts. I just need to learn how to enjoy the feasts again.
3 comments:
Hi Barb! You know what takes the joy and thrill away from me sometimes during the holidays? It's the busyness, especially at Christmas. I love the holidays and making them special for my family and others, but sometimes my list of "tasks" is endless. So I am trying to go the special but simple route. Otherwise I will be just too worn out to focus on Christ, the significance of the holiday, and my family and friends. The story of Jesus visiting Mary and Martha really hits me between the eyes a lot of times. I need Christ's help to put my priorities in the right place.
Sometimes I will get blue as I think
back to my childhood and the special memories and that thrill as you alluded to, missing those good old days especially because my dad isn't with us anymore. (He gets to celebrate all the time in Heaven though.:))
Anyway,I hope you will be filled with joy once again. Sometimes we can be very thankful but those emotions (as you mentioned) are just fickle. I know mine can be!! I will continue to pray for you!! Have a blessed Easter!
P.S. Thank you for adding me on to your blog! I still have to have my "blogger" husband put your link on mine because we all know about my "Lucy Moments"! :)
Though the efforts are much more work and much less excitement now that we're adults, the traditions you are passing along to your children are worthwhile.
All 4 of my grandparents were far away when I was growing up. It was always just the four of us for the holidays and they were just as special.
Thanks for your encouragement, ladies. I think part of my problem is serious family issues that have recently come to a head. I have to adjust to the way things are and enjoy what is there.
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